I Could Have Gone In Either Direction...

I started the day with one state of mind. I end it trying not to succumb to another. Within a span of 13 hours, what was so positive has now become this fleeting speck of happiness. Life curves that way sometimes.

Without a lot of specifics, I'll give you a break down of this day in my life. I began feeling wonderful! I opened my eyes and saw promise all around me. The weather was great! The sun was shining. With the sliding glass door opened, I could hear the chirping of birds and feel the rustle of the breeze outside. My future stretched out in front of me like a huge yellow brick road. Then a truck pulled up across the street. A man got out of the truck. He walked into my yard. He and I had a conversation that lasted about 30 seconds. He was a schmuck. Then the downward spiral began. The day took a sharp turn at that point, all that was clear to me then was problems.

Those problems seemed to come one right after another. Schmuck, car not running right, unforeseen errands with strict time restraints, car stops running, figure out how to get car back to house from fives houses down the block and uphill, no one answering their phone. They seemed to jump on my back to the point that I felt like Neo in the second Matrix movie. You know the scene where he fought all those Agent Smiths on the basketball court. I, unfortunately, don't think that I was able to throw my Agent Smiths off and continue to fight the good fight.

It's very easy to talk about remaining positive in the face of challenges. The minute you start to talk about how positive your life is becoming and how close you are to a breakthrough, that's when negativity tries most urgently to take hold of you. I have spent the week, until today, talking with a good friend about how everything was shifting and we were just around the corner from the greatness that God has planned for us. So, I suppose that is why, today, my faith had to be called into question.

The good news for me, right now I have chosen! I am not doubting. I am still believing God for all that I know He can and will do. I am still grateful for all that He has done and everything He is currently doing. I still plan to give God the seed of my faith. I plan to stay the course with those things that He has anointed me to fulfill. I am undeterred by the few things that transpired today. I am choosing to hold on to that fleeting speck of happiness and pull until it stretches into a blinding array. I have been chosen to fulfill a distinct purpose. I accept that calling, knowing that some days will be painful and dark. However, I am ready because my best days are yet to come.